"Do or Do Not. There is No Try."

"Do or Do Not. There is No Try"- Master Yoda. (Empire Strikes Back)

New Year's Resolutions:

I like making resolutions. Maybe I won't keep them all as faithfully as I should but that is no reason not to try right? I completely believe you have to constantly work towards improving yourself AND I like making lists AND I love having projects, so the natural combination of that is a list of resolutions! So here are my top ten (you can't have too many resolutions just in case you were wondering)....carefully thought out and edited!

1. Continue weight loss- concentrating on making exercise and healthy eating a normal everyday part of life. Working out 3 times a week with weights, running at least one mile 5 times a week.

2. Keep house cleaner! - concentrating on making cleaning something that is done constantly throughout the day instead of as a chore that must be gotten through as quickly as possible!

3. Finish Project List- I have had this list for ... I don't know... years. Let's get this list done for heaven's sake!

4. Do a Bible study every night- yes for those of you out there judging me- I don't always do a Bible study every night. I know, I know. It's on the list.

5. Get my own complaint bracelet- I am tired of waiting for the real one. That isn't a complaint! Or is it? In any case, I can do my own "no complaining" thing, then I can make up my own rules!
6. Find ways to improve myself -Including but not limited to.... reading educational books, getting involved in a church somewhere (if I can ever decide where to go), learning how to do new things (I am currently working on crocheting), learn to be a better cook, etc etc.

7. Keep better records of Anna-start scrapbook of Anna, write more in Anna's baby book, video Anna more.

8. unspoken (thats right! I do have some secrets!)

9. unspoken again (this is my blog and I don't have to tell you everything!)

and finally...

10. Be the absolute best mom I can be to the wonderful little girl that God has given me to take care of!

Answer to comment left on my Afrin blog

Here is the comment left on my "New Best Friend" Blog regarding my use of Afrin.

"Isn't that stuff addictive? - Julie"

Dear Gentle Reader Julie-
Ah how quickly jealously rears it's ugly head. Don't be sad because I have a new best friend! I still love you, just not as much. Hahahaha....

In answer to your question - yes Afrin is quite highly addictive. And for your information, I followed the directions on the bottle like a good consumer and only took the medicine for 3 days. Ok fine- I gave in and took it one dose more than the allotted 3 days. I had about a day of irritating stuffiness (and I might add that the last dose burned like crazy), during which I admit I did worry that maybe I had gotten addicted to it in just 3.5 short days. My dear brother told me the first 48 hours are the worst coming off of any drug and not to worry. (: The directions also state that if you use it more than the 3 days allowed by the medicine men that it might result in a reversal and you might experience more stuffiness! So that was irritating and I guess only what I deserved.
Thank you for your concern,

Amber

Frustration

Do you ever feel like you are running and running as hard as you can and still losing ground? Or that sometimes you actually catch sight of the goal and then you stumble across a boulder in your path that you didn't even see coming and the goal is gone again?

Christmas Pictures

Here are some pictures of Christmas- Adam went out and got Anna a golf club just her size! It has a pink handle and she loves it. I am thinking things like "broken tv, another hole in my chair", but he is just thinking "my daughter loves golf just as much as I do". (:



Later in the day Anna sat in this same stroller and insisted on being pushed around.



Slide is a hit!




This is the train from Nana and Papa- this thing makes like 50 gajillion noises and she absolutely loves it.




Playing with her new kitchen. It is so funny how kids know exactly how to use things they have never used before. She "fills" her cups up in the fridge door and pushes the different buttons for ice cubes, pulled all the dishes out and put them in the sink, called Nana and told her about the kitchen, pushed all the microwave buttons, etc.












Never can have too many baby dolls.



Lightning McQueen car - I got her 3 of these then took them all back because I was worried about the wheels coming off and choking her. Luckily Daddy got her one because she sure was jealous of her cousin Josh's cars.

"Opening presents is such hard work!"

Our Christmas

Oh my goodness the gluttony that has occured these last two days.... I would hang my head in shame if the 3 chins I have added were not taking up all the room between my head and shoulders. Ok it wasn't really that bad compared to the way I used to eat. But after 6+ mos of eating much more carefully (and by carefully I mean more like a normal person eats) even a medium indulgence seems like a ridiculous amount of food!

Aside from the eating, Christmas was great this year. We had a wonderful time with my in-laws last night and with my family today. Anna got such wonderful presents this year. I don't even know how we will ever top this Christmas for gifts so perhaps it is good that she really won't remember this one! Anna was a lot of fun this year. She certainly knows what to do with presents now! She kept asking for more presents all day. She loves her kitchen and her train and all the other things she got. Thank you so much to everyone for her gifts!

I hope you all had as great a Christmas as we did. I am so thankful for the blessing of great family.

Merry Christmas

Just wanted to say Merry Christmas to everyone! I hope you all have a wonderful holiday with family and friends, that you get every present you ever wanted, that everyone eats too much and gets really fat so that I am not the only one having to work out like a contestant on the biggest loser.... oh sorry did I really type that? (: Enjoy the holidays!

I will see you all back here (hopefully) for the New Year's Resolution blog (for preview see above statement about working out...sigh....)

God Bless you!

My New Best Friend

One of my old best friends introduced me to my new best friend the other day. We hit it off right away. Seriously, my new best friend is wonderful. Unselfish, strong, a little quiet, giving, always there when I need my new best friend. My new best friend came to me in my hour of need and did not let me down. I was a little skeptical but my new best friend came through for me. It's like my new best friend was created solely to help me in my distress and to help me breathe the fresh air in a whole new way..... my new best friend is ......

More Pics of Anna

Here are the other pictures from Anna's 18 month sitting that I have given in and purchased and two from her Christmas sitting. Thanks for looking!

When the whole world was against me....

I thought maybe it was time for a funny story again so here is the story of when the whole world was against me.

Once upon a time....

back in my younger days I had a tendency to get really stressed out and feel like the whole world was against me. (Thank heavens I have conquered that tendency...oh wait....). At the time of this story I was working at TE Mortgage and my husband had just made a career change due to some unforseen and very unexpected problems with his dad's company. This of course laid the foundation for my stress. I have never handled uncertainty with finances well at all and I of course assume the absolute worst. I just knew we would lose the house and everything we had in the house and that we would have to declare bankruptcy and have to go to debtors prison or the workhouse. (You see how my mind spirals downward.) So, Adam was trying to start up a business with my boss. Having a husband and a boss working together in your building can be ... let's use the word fun. Added to this uncertainty of whether this business would be able to pay our bills or in any way work for our future and the fact that several of the people in the business that I worked for did not in any way like the idea of this new business sucking up cash and the ...fun... of having your husband and boss working together in the same building you work in, were a few more problems. For one, my Papa was having health issues again. This was one of the times when his normal health problems were worse than normal. Second, my beloved brother had just moved to Tennessee which is 8 hours away from me. This I did not like. At all. Thirdly- my job at the time could include very stressful days of "must have now" and "numbers need to be higher" etc etc. There were a few more things stressing me out which to be honest I don't even remember now- I just remember the overwhelming feeling of everything going very badly. Financial stress is just about the worse kind of stress for me. (Worrying about losing a loved one is the worst for anyone who wants to know.) So, again, here I am under a lot of stress. Please don't judge me if you don't think these things should have stressed me out- whether they should have or not - the fact remains that I was very stressed!

So one night, after a very stressful, busy day of dealing with demanding loan officers and underwriters, I get in the car with my husband to drive home. It was a white ford explorer for the record. Adam was driving. Like the nice husband he is, he picked me up at the door. I get in the car and sit down and the dumb car dies. Ok that's weird. Adam tried to start it again. Doesn't start. Ok.... I get out of the car to do who knows what and it starts again. So I get back in the car and it dies. What in the world is going on! Everytime I got in the car the stupid thing died! Everytime I got out of the car it would start and run just fine. !!!!! So Adam and I switch places. I drive and he gets in the passenger side. It runs just fine! I am not going to lie to you- there were some tears. So we go home. Next day the same thing happens! I get in, car dies. This car hates me, right!?! I am not making this up- the car would run just fine until I got in the passenger side. I had to ride around in the backseat like a child for days! I mean really..... what can even cause such a weird thing to happen? Seriously- at this point I knew this was all happening because the world actually was against me. What more proof do you need? (:

Actually it turns out that somehow when I got into the car, I was kicking a wire buried under the floorboard that had a short in it. Seriously....what a dumb thing. Adam didn't put his feet in the same spot as I did to get in so he never hit the wire. Why do these things happen to me? Geez, what a frustration that was! (:

Stickers!

My house is covered in stickers. I have found stickers stuck on my kitchen cabinets, the bathroom cabinets, the kitchen floor, the living room floor, the couch, the chair, the hallway floor, the table, the basket in my tv cabinet, Anna's dresser, Anna's clothes, the bottom of my socks, in Anna's hair, on my arm, the fridge, and in Anna' mouth. I am sure there are more out there waiting to be discovered. We have bright pink, green, yellow and orange dots, Little Mermaid, Cars, Nemo and all his friends, princess, bubbles, farm, puppies, Belle, zoo, and of course, all the random pieces between the actual stickers. Who knew that for $5 a week you can entertain your toddler for hours on end? I love the man who invented stickers. (: Christmas will be great because Grandma T got Anna a set of 300 stickers! That should last about 2 days.

More

This is one of my favorite songs. You have to read it as a song sung by God to you. I think it is a great reminder of how much God loves us.

"More"

Take a look at the mountains
Stretching a mile high
Take a look at the ocean
Far as your eye can see
And think of Me
Take a look at the desert
Do you feel like a grain of sand?
I am with you wherever
Where you go is where I am
And I'm always thinking of you
Take a look around you
I'm spelling it out one by one

(Chorus)
I love you more than the sun
And the stars that I taught how to shine
You are mine, and you shine for me too
I love you,
yesterday and today
And tomorrow,
I'll say it again and again
I love you more

Just a face in the city
Just a tear on a crowded street
But you are one in a million
And you belong to Me
And I want you to know
That I'm not letting go
Even when you come undone

(Chorus)
I love you more than the sun
And the stars that I taught how to shine
You are mine, and you shine for me too
I love you,
yesterday and today
And tomorrow,
I'll say it again and again
I love you more
I love you more

Shine for Me
Shine for Me
Shine on, shine on
Shine for Me

(Chorus)
I love you more than the sun
And the stars that I taught how to shine
You are mine, and you shine for me too
I love you,
yesterday and today
And tomorrow,
I'll say it again and again
I love you more

Than the sun
and the stars that I taught how to shine
You are mine, and you shine for me too
I love you,
yesterday and today
Through the joy and the pain
I'll say it again and again
I love you more
I love you more
And I see you
And I made you
And I love you more than you can imagine
More than you can fathom
I love you more than the sun
And you shine for me

What Anna is up to these days...

One of the delights of having a child that I just never fully comprehended until we had Anna is watching them learn and grow and change. She is such a delightful baby and I am still a little in awe that she is mine. I now fully understand how parents can talk about their children nonstop and laugh over the smallest, silliest things that those kids do. Everything your child does (even the naughty things) are fascinating to you. I also have fallen into the classic mom's habit of discussing your child's poo but that is another post. (:

In any case... here are a couple of things Anna has been doing lately. I can brag here in my blog without being too awfully annoying to everyone!

1. Hand! Anna has lately taken to demanding "hand!" which means give me your hand and let me take you to whatever toy or puzzle or drink that she wants at that exact moment. It's the cutest thing! And she really loves to have one person on each side of her so she has two hands to hold and two people to order around. Make no mistake- that is what she is doing. If you tell her you are busy she will just stand there and say "hand! hand!" over and over til you give in. Not that I ever give in to her. (: But the sweetest part of this new demand is when she asks for your hand when she is in her carseat and she simply wants to hold your hand on the ride home.

2. Words. Anna is such a little talker. The number of words this child uses is crazy! After a recent parents as teachers visit, I sat down and wrote down every word I could remember hearing Anna use (not just repeat). I stopped at 100. Since then I have heard so many more. Sometimes she will say something that I have no idea where she even picked up!

3. Hugs and Kisses. Anna is such a loving baby. She hugs on everyone, even her dolls. And her books. Most of the time when I read to her we have to stop every couple pages so she can press her face to the page. (that's how she hugs). When she is forced to be still (like during diaper changes) she will grab whatever stuffed animal she can get her hands on and just kiss (audibly) it over and over. It is so funny. She esp. wants to hug and kiss on whatever little kid is around. Most of her little playmates are boys so I guess I will have to watch that tendency!

4. Dance. Oh my goodness the dancing! She loves loves loves to dance! She dances to commercials, to music on her movies, in the car, wherever and whenever she hears a good beat. She moves her little arms around mostly but also spins and is starting to pick up her feet. She really wants to jump but can't quite figure it out. She loves to be picked up and spun around or have me hold her and jump.

ok this is getting really long and I could go on and on... so I will stop for now and maybe write some more later about this delightful, perfect little girl that God has given me. But just for the record, I could write til my hands fell off and still not be able to tell you how wonderful she is and how much she is to me and her daddy.

Anna's 18 Month Pictures

My little baby is 18 mos old! She is getting to be such a big girl. Here are the pictures we got taken this week. I might be a big sucker and go buy some additional poses. It was very difficult to decide which ones to buy with a store full of people and everyone waiting on me to make a decision! As usual I am not second guessing the ones I bought and wishing I had bought other ones!

Postscript

Adam said it was mean to call him a dumbsmack.....even though he totally was. But seriously, even if he does stupid things like swing a golf club in the house, I do love my husband!

GRRRRR....

I forgot to report what my dumbsmack husband did the other night. I come home all innocent and carefree from a shopping trip with my sister and hang out a little while with her and my mom. They leave and I am picking up the living room and out of the corner of my eye I catch a glimpse of something on the arm of my chair. Being the good housewife I go over to investigate.

(in my head)
"What is that on the chair.....that's weird...wait a minute...what the hell..... is my chair RIPPED? What the HELL happened to my chair? How the HELLFIRE did my chair get a huge enormous rip right in the very front of the arm?"

As I turn around to try and figure out what happened I see my husband with his sheepish "hehe..oops" look on his face and I also see the golf club sticking out of the back of chair.

(in my head again)
"What did he do.....what did he do? You have GOT to be kidding me! I am going to kill him dead right now. I am going to take the golf club and hit HIM with it in the HEAD!"

(to my husband)
"What did you do!?!!!! Did you HIT my chair with your golf club? Adam! Seriously! I cannot freaking believe you ripped my chair with your dumb golf club! What the hell were you thinking swinging that thing in here? Don't swing that in here again!"

And he had the NERVE to tell me I was "overreacting". He's lucky we had an identical chair in the bedroom so now its just my bedroom chair that looks like we bought it at a flea market.

This is why we can't have nice things.

These are a few of my favorite things... about Christmas!

Having a Christmas tree all lit up, warming the room by its very presence.

Houses that have way too many lights in the yard.

The air of secrecy.

The planning.

Mom's peanut brittle. And telling her every year that I want to make it this year so I learn how and then every year letting her do it so I don't mess it up. It's very complicated! And then insisting on helping her "pull" it and burning my fingers on the sticky mess.

Sneaking one more bite of candy.

Wrapping Presents.

Cutting out snowflakes with Dad and knowing that this year we are continuing that tradition with a whole new generation.

Remembering the anticipation of Christmas' past.

The music. The old-fashioned hymns. Hearing a church choir and congregation lifting the voices in praise.

The togetherness of family and friends.

Making that extra dessert that no one needs.

The smells.

The love.

Irony

Is it wrong to complain about the fact that I haven't received my "no complaints" bracelet yet? (:

Moments

Sometimes I think there is nothing sweeter in life than snuggling up on the couch with my daughter tucked up in my lap, her head right underneath my chin, to read book after book.

I am.....

I am stealing this post from my sister-in-law Julie - she did this for one of her classes and I thought it was a neat idea so here goes....oh you can't use descriptions that would be considered an opinion like funny or smart, etc. Only facts.


I AM:

I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, a daughter-in-law, a sister, a sister-in-law, a granddaughter, a cousin, a niece, a stay-at-home mom, a worrier, a friend, a believer, a scrapbooker, 30 years old, a new runner, a walker, a cat and dog owner, not a drinker, a home owner, an American, a woman, a tv watcher, on a diet, a worrier, a reader, a blogger, green eyed, 5 foot 9 inches, a shopper, a traveler, brown haired, a voter, a worrier, a licensed driver, addicted to tea, not a smoker, a Missourian, a contact lenses wearer, a church goer, and......out of ideas.

Advice

"Just take it one gigantic, earth-shattering crisis at a time. "

Just Talking....

I am pretty sure no one is still reading this blog but it is kind've nice to still have. I like having somewhere to record myself. I don't like the physical act of writing. Perhaps its because I hate my handwriting. Oh yes, and there is no backspace key with a pen. In any case, I do love "keeping a journal" - just not on paper. Online works much better for me. Of course, I can't tell this diary EVERY thought that goes through my head just in case people are still reading it. But the thoughts that I wouldn't want to post are also the thoughts that are probably better left unrecorded in any fashion. Paranoid? perhaps. Too much damage can be done by words. I have learned that over the years. And even when everyone agrees to forgive and forget I believe the words spoken can still linger on in people's souls years later. So for anyone still reading- you are getting a glimpse into my heart and mind and soul but maybe not too deep of one. (:

I do wonder how well some of my friends actually know me. It is interesting how over the years you can start to know someone better than they even think you do. Several years ago, Adam and I saw a movie and after the first preview I leaned over to Adam and pointed to a woman on the screen and said "you hate her, don't you?" Now he has never told me this and I have no idea how I knew but I just knew that he couldn't stand something about her. I freaked him out! He couldn't believe I knew that. I think I hide large chunks of myself away from people but you wonder how much they pick up just from being around you so much. Sometimes I do feel like certain people do not "see" the real me. And maybe wouldn't like me as much if they did. I hope that I do a good job of "seeing" and loving my friends the way they are.